My big 40 is now 4 days away (eek) and this what I’m thinking.

In my next life I want to live my life backwards. You start out dead and get that out of the way. Then you wake up in an old people’s home feeling better every day. You get kicked out for being too healthy, go collect your pension, and then when you start work, you get a gold watch and a party on your first day. You work for 40 years (have your 40th along the way) until you’re young enough to enjoy your retirement. You party, drink alcohol, and are generally promiscuous, then you are ready for school with all your mates. You then go to primary school, you become a kid, you play. You have no responsibilities, you become a baby until you are born. And then you spend your last 9 months floating in luxurious spa-like conditions with central heating and room service on tap, larger quarters every day and then Voila! You finish off as an orgasm. Nice. I rest my case. Goodnight.

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I was thinking to myself the other morning, as I took delivery of my new Zebra Skinned shoes  (ebay- £35..no other biddders), only four weeks til lthe big 40, at what point in my life do I reach the stage of fully fledged mature adult?

If I was to make a valued judgement based on my past ancestoral jean pool then the likelihood of me reaching ‘adult nirvana’ doesn’t look good.  For much of history the Reilly clan smmed to have following a path of taking nothing seriously for as long as humanly possible (sorry Dad) and this batton seems to have past down to me.

So why am I contemplating this now? Well its that realisation that as I approach that landmark 40, I have become a fully fledged member of that ever growing cultural socio-economic group; prolonged  immaturity or the Kid-ult.

From time to time I feel a twitch of regret when I think of where I could be; married, 2 kids, 2 up 2 down in some low budget semi in the suberbs..but then I think if I’m not going to get married right now I might as well join the rollercoast of instant gratification, do what you want when you want..with a smile of your face.  Have the GREATEST TIME EVER HAMMING IT UP AND HAVING FUN… YEH. The Sunday Time magazine recently profiled this new group as a ‘Kid-ult’ old enough to be an adult but most definately possessing the mature outlook of a 5 year old. They are characterised by ‘a need for escapism and an acute obsession with pursueing youthful frolics’. It like’s reading a profile of..er..me.

So anyway, to much contemplating adult hood can be way to tiring so I’m off to the Borough Market Market Tavern for a cold ale to show off my new Zebra skins.